What Are Realistic Ways to Manage Stress Without Reaching for a Credit Card?

Have you ever told yourself I deserve this? Right before you clicked purchase?Not because you're reckless, not because you don't care, but because you're tired or maybe you're stressed, or maybe you're just overwhelmed and for just a moment, buying something feels like relief. Well, that is until the statement arrives. And now the stress is still there. Plus they've added interest to it. Friend, this isn't about math.It's really about emotion. So today we're going to break the cycle in a way that works in real life. Hey, friend. Ralph Estep Jr. Here.Welcome to financially Confident Christian, where every day we work to break the cycle of financial shame and do it with confidence. And today we're talking about managing stress without reaching for a credit card. Well, let's get right to today's listener question.Listener writes this Ralph When I'm stressed, I reach for my credit card and afterward I'm flooded with regret. I'm not trying to be irresponsible in the moment. It just feels like the only relief that I have.Then the guilt hits and the balance grows and I feel stuck in the same pattern again. How do I break the cycle in a way that's actually realistic for my real life? And I like the way they ended that question.For my real life, it's real easy to have pie in the sky ideas. We'll never do that. We're never going to have stress and we're never going to have anxiety. But the truth is you can't eliminate stress.You just have to replace it with an outlet. So let's talk about how to navigate this. First thing I'm going to encourage you to do is to create a 24 hour rule.If you've been a long time listener in this show, you know, this is one of my go to things because impulsiveness lives in urgency. But if you build a delay into your system, you can stop that.So when you're feeling stressed, when you're feeling overwhelmed, just say to yourself, look, I'm not going to purchase anything for the next 24 hours. I'm kind of feeling like that today. Had a rough weekend, a lot of emotional stuff going on. So for me right now I've got to put that pause on.I'm going to put it in the cart. Maybe I'll screenshot it. Hey, I might even break out the pen and paper and write it down.But I'm not going to swipe that credit card because what I've come to realize is that delay disrupts that emotion. And a Lot of times in 24 hours, I don't even want to think. So that's where you start.Second thing, you've got to really identify what is the real trigger here. I think so many times we don't realize what the real trigger is. So ask yourself, is this exhaustion? Do you find yourself doing this at night?I think a lot of us do that. We get on our feet, phone, and we're scrolling through the apps and all of a sudden we're on TikTok.I don't know about you, but everything now, tick tock is selling everything no matter where you turn. I'm not trying to pick on TikTok, but they're selling everything. But is it exhaustion? Maybe it's conflict.Maybe you're in a battle with your spouse or somebody at work and you're just like, I gotta escape from this. I think for a lot of us it's loneliness. Just want something to soothe us. Or maybe like me during tax season, it's just a state of being overworked.Because what I have found, and I think a lot of people would agree with me here, spending is often this self soothing thing. But once you name that trigger, you can treat the cause of it, not just the symptom. Now we've talked about how to find it.Now I want to encourage you to really build what I call a stress menu.Kind of like when you go to a restaurant, you need to have some options and in this case you've got to have some replacements ready, not some vague ideas. Oh, Ralph gave me some vague ideas. Some pie in the sky things. No, I'm talking about a written list.And when you're feeling that pressure, when you're feeling that anxiety, that overwhelm or that loneliness, what are your go to things? Maybe for you it's a 10 minute walk outside. I find that to be a great way to do it. Maybe call a friend.Now listen, don't call a friend to commiserate about what you're going to buy, but maybe call a friend and say, hey, I'm just having a rough day. Maybe go take a hot shower or maybe a cold shower just to reset your body, journal what you're feeling.I think journaling is sometimes overlooked these days. You may even do a recorded journal. There's a podcast in there somewhere. Today's Ralph's daily Journal.One of the things I love to do is listen to worship music. And I've mentioned before on our other channel, Truth Unveiled with Rob, we've got, I think it's almost 30 worship songs.Now we'll put a link in the show, notes to that. But read one of the book of Psalms or maybe just sit outside for five minutes and just appreciate all that God has given us.But when that stress hits, when that anxiety feels like it's coming up to a boiling point, you go right to your menu because then you've prepared. And that preparation builds. Beats willpower every time. Now here's a real practical thing you can do. Make your credit card harder to reach.First thing. I've mentioned this on the show before. Remove stored payment methods from websites.Yes, I know it's a pain in the neck now, but it's so much simpler not to spend. If you got to go find your credit card, take that credit card out of your wallet. Now here's a really cool idea.Freeze that credit card in a container of water if you need to. Yes, put it in a container of water and put it in a freezer. Talking about a cool idea, but it works.What you're really doing here is you're creating friction. And friction reduces that impulse because impulse thrives on convenience. So we've got to make it inconvenient. But also you got to do this.Add a small planned relief category because if you never allow enjoyment, you're going to eventually explode financially. So build a small amount of for guilt free treats. My wife and I went out for dinner last night and I've really been focused on my health.And we got to the end of dinner, she says we should treat ourselves to a dessert. So we did. We shared one. I took about a quarter of it. But if you got to build those things in. So maybe coffee's yours or a book or maybe a dinner out.That plan relief prevents panic spending. Say that 10 times over. A lot of peas there. But that plan relief prevents that panic spending. In the end, relief doesn't have to cost interest.So here's your win for today. I want to encourage you to write your stress menu, find five healthy alternatives and keep it in your phone or put it where you're going to see it.And when that urge hits, and trust me, life is not a spectator sport, the urge is going to hit. You don't have to think anymore. You just go, let me go to the menu. And then you choose what works for you. Let's get right to God's word.Today we're going to go right to Proverbs, chapter 25, verse 28. And it says, like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self control.It's pretty blunt, but the truth is self control builds protective walls that guard your peace and your finances. And that's what we really have to focus in on today. Why don't we pray together, Lord, you see the stress that my friend carries right now.You see the moments that they're reaching for relief. So we just ask that you would help them. Pause right now, Lord.Help them to breathe, help them to choose wisdom over impulse, strengthen their self control and calm their nervous system. And remind them always that you are the refuge, not that shopping cart.We ask that you would help us to break that cycle, restore their peace and guide their decisions towards freedom. And we ask this in Jesus name. Amen, friend. You're not weak, you're just learning a new way to cope.And breaking the stress stranding cycle starts with honesty. You gotta be honest with yourself. So if this episode hit home for you, I'd love to hear your story or tell me about the next step you're taking.What are some of those stress reliever menu items that you have? You can go right to our website at Financiallyconfidentchristian.com/voicemail I'll put a link in the show notes, you can click right on it.But I would love to hear how this show is impacting you. If you've got some ideas of how to get past this, go to financiallyconfidentchristian.com/voicemail I just want to thank you for joining me today.As always, stay financially savvy. May God bless you and you have a truly great day today.